Unspoken Longings

Jesus knew that they wanted to ask him, so he said to them, "Is this what you are asking yourselves, what I meant by saying, 'A little while and you will not see me, and again a little while and you will see me'? - John 16:19

Do you remember? It always amazed me, leaving me bewildered and slightly in awe. Some concern had been building inside of me, maybe a troubling question, or crime that had lingered unconfessed too long, but eventually the pressure grew too great to contain. So I would muster the courage to finally come clean, or have the difficult conversation I knew was needed, and I would look for the opportune time to speak with my parents. But it was never easy was it? The well-rehearsed opening lines seemed to stick in my mouth, often only forced out by a deep inhalation and and elevated heart rate.

Yet, more often than not, the fateful moment would come prematurely, initiated by a frustratingly perceptive parent. Dad would simply say, “Spit it out, son, what is it?” Or mum would comfort me, before I’d even confessed, with a gentle hand on my shoulder or a warm embrace, as she quietly spoke, “I know it’s hard, but it will be better once it’s been said.”

However the conversation progressed, I always walked away with a single question, “How did they know?”

But now I have children, five in fact, and something happened with the miracle of parenthood—I began to know things! I suspect it’s the intimacy of knowing another person so deeply that allows us to see the unspoken longings of the heart. Little tells, and subtle shifts in behaviour and speech. Whatever it is, if you’re a parent, you just know.

I’m so glad Jesus knows us like that. I’m so glad he sees my unspoken longings, discerns my heart, perceives my fears from afar, and gently draws alongside and whispers, “I know.” As he did with his children enslaved in Egypt, God sees us, and God knows (Ex 2:25). Yes, even that fear you’re recalling right now. He knows. That doubt that plagues your sleep? He knows. The question you’ve longed to ask? He knows. Dear Christian, take a deep breath, draw close, and embrace the one who already knows, yet invites you still to abide in him.